but lets,s not talk of ribauld quips  or rats deserting sinking ships
of irishmen in dingy bars  of chicky chicky,s kissing lips
but it,s a nifty fifty meter how you,d like to see her bathe
but whip yourself instead to lather lather as it,s time to shave
as i think of good times bad timescorridors and rooms with views
( what on earth should we tell chuck and randy how should we break unto them the news )
but beach boys california dreaminglets not twist or scream and shout
a smirkin gerkin of a lounger a hundred half knowns in and out
like kev blockhead (red than dead) how he drinks but no to tokes
as well as "awfully pass the water"home made stew a hundred jokes
as pats me fats it,s that bloke what bloke
steaming cowpat gibber gabber ware the stair pretend you care
on summer nights beach blubbing blabber
as i see them tete a teting down that dingy little hall
is she going out with him and  ...... does he really care at all

but vincent van said ... like a drunk on a bed
you,ll never sort it,s pat all out
 as like an elf could be yourself he once lived where or whereabout
cause a corridor you can,t be sure but jack the ripper,s doing well
the harmony head of the buzzcocks spread it,s said that only time will tell
cause he kept on intending .. a happy so ending .. like romeo he wrote a rhyme ..
a double d he came to see .... maybe baby one more time ..
and is that a chicky i see before me ... by the buttocks of my chums
it,s long been said by the harmony head that a wicked willy quicly comes
but it,s said that the bobbit he wasn,t a hobbit ...a cupboard so beneath the stairs ..
he,ll pleat the beard .... was the butter smeared .and who,s got flowers on his flarres ...
but don,t live in dread of thre harmony head a winters fairy tale a walk
he once lived where but just not there
but then in truth ... it,s good to talk ...

meet the flintstones cluedo cluedo   yabba dabba do
  an all night flight a neander light   miss scarlet if you do
  cause kiss me kate its not too late  a ship ahoy iceberg to list
what does he need a whale in greed a qualified psychiatrist
but it,s alright . . not on the night  "be paranoid"  it,s said he hissed
cause in the dark of "razzzle dazzle" 
would the kissy yet be kissed

a royal as armchair (  regina regina )
a doctor once said it,s angina angina
until last orders repel borders"don,t get too excited!
but did she swoon and came too soon unto his chambers invited
but is he riding for a fall impale the whale we heard it all
with tim it,s a fashion with ally it,s passion his love it was requited
and shiver me timbers the entwined of limber
but don,t get too turkish delighted

much ado  . . . it,s . . . plots and hatchings
lager lager pork and scratchings
times of ribauld and mirth
as little jack horners in  dictionary corner
for round two of ribauld and smirth
"oh . . . so i,m a  . . . clod of land am i  ?"
"am i . . . .  just a lump of turf ?"