pat-o-man pat-o-man
 nutty as fruitcake am

mke me a nice cup of tea
woofters and tweeters ( all gormenghast creepers ) it,s said the thelady did flee

as talking of gladrags and hideous old hags only a few out of phwoar
as cruising for bruising but oh how amusing a pile of mags on the floor
and as i did flick through oh how i could see through
things seemed to come to a head
and is that a chicky that i see before me "miss staples" shes all centrespread

and greasy as mittums for "big um as tittums" a room for the night and carress
cause a one night stand would have been so grand
when it came so to time to undess

but "hotlips" v "botlips" it,s "chicky as choplips"but theres a time and a place
it was a present all wide angled and cresent a shame about the face

 but "hotlops" v "botlips" those "chicky as choplips taken for a ride or
  or maybe he,ll now tell us all his caring and sensitive side

( he,d like to teach the world to ming
but it,s whose lairs hairs my ding a ling )

and it,s all so jeux sans frontier
when it,s peter plays and it,s live

but caroline courtney it,s engagement
a flower a gnome a home arrangement
take a chance to queen romance
a wench a barmaid good sir please
a wager of love and a heart like a dove
flapping gently in the breeze
but the "z yawn of snooker" . . .  star wars it,s trooper
outgoing but maybe he,s not
and pray sir tell "how many bytes . . . . has your computer got"
and we all know we,ve seen the show in actual actuality
it,s a crack it,s in the sack the eros of reality
as in the end well it,s a trend . . .  as in the breeze the curtains part
whos the duchess in disquise
who,s the gaurdian of the heart

a furtive aside am i set fror a ride
tallyho tallyo or a fall
we all chase the bare it,s the fun of the fair
at the . . . all . . . nobbing jill . . . carnival